A Warm Jacket

I am so thankful to say we've had a few donations come in. $620 since we started our tax deductible website(praise God!) and $24,380 to go to be able to bring our boy home, for good. 

My husband and I started reading a prayer book and I really find myself in prayer a whole lot more. Would you join me? We know without a doubt this boy is the will of God. That He broke or hearts for him and set him in our family. With that being said, our prayers need to be bold and strong, without weakness, knowing that God is going to finish what He started. That this is impossible to us, but to Him, it's not. He already has it all planned and figured out. We are praying to be connected to the right people at the right time, for the hearts of those who come in contact with our grant applications, our website, our fundraisers, and our story. Praying all these hearts WILL be stirred in an incredible way. Knowing that the body of christ is going to rise up and redeem another life worth fighting for.   Praying that for even those of us who only have $1 to spare will know that it it counts and it helps and that dollar will be blessed. The more we give of what we don't have, the more God pours down blessing on ourselves. Pray for open hearts and open minds. Pray for Godspeed. We want this only to make sense to Him, so HE can receive all the glory. Pray, pray hard. We are desperate to get this boy home where he is loved and cherished. 

I asked Sergey what he needed, as I was going to mail him a Christmas package. He will never go another holiday or birthday again without knowing he's loved, wanted and cared about. He said "momma, a warm jacket would be good, headphones and some candy. Only if you can. I love you very, very much mom". He needs a jacket. A warm jacket. Tears roll down my cheeks as I read those words. First, I love his heart. Second, it's just killing me to think of this sweet boy freezing, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Kills me. He doesn't deserve this. He's a child of God and we need to get him out of there to make him one less, one less orphan. So I ran out, got him a warm coat, $4.99 headphones and a little bit of candy and off it went. He's already thanked me. A thankful heart...oh how I miss him.

Please pray hard for every aspect of this adoption. God hears every prayer. And if you feel your heart moved by this incredible boy, consider giving this holiday season to an amazing cause...freeing our boy.

Sweet Boy

Last night my husband and I were laying in bed, it's late and we needed to go to sleep. He thought he would check his VK one more time and I'm so glad he did. Alex had sent Sergey a car photo from an event the other week. Sergey loves cars just like dad. Instead of first saying Something about the the cars, he says "daddy I miss you so much. How are things?". I can read right between those words and know he's longing to be WITH his dad at the fun car stuff. I can read the desperation and sadness of him not being here. All my momma heart wants to do is catch the next flight out and go get him. If only things were that simple.

This boy is about to be 17. 17, aging out and with a heart condition. He's been institutionalized for SO long that this kid will just not survive the streets. He is a kind, sweet boy who deserves love and his family back.

His director told us he's only now doing better because he has hope in his heart again because he has a family and his family is coming to get him. I sit here and sometimes think...what on earth am I going to say to him if we can't come up with the money? I try to not let myself go there, but somedays it's hard thinking about the very large amount of money we still need. I see that number and it feels impossible. It IS impossible for us, but I constantly remind myself it IS possible for Him.

Please don't let this boy become another statistic on the street. Would you please find it in your heart to give? NO amount is too small. Every dollar helps write this boy's new future.

www.adopttogether.org/bringsergeyhome

Donation Site

We finally have our tax-deductible donation site set up! Get a year end deduction and please help us bring home our boy!!

Follow this Link:

https://www.adopttogether.org/bringsergeyhome

Please help bring our boy home!

My husband, Alex, and I, Danielle, never imagined 5 years ago this is where we would be today. But God has His own plans, and here we are. This is our story; it may be long but to see just how orchestrated this is by God, we wanted to include every detail.

It was February 13^th , the day Alex and I got married at the city hall in San Francisco. I had always wanted to get married on Valentines, but the year we wanted to get married, Valentines was a Saturday and we wanted to get married at city hall. So, Friday the 13^th in 2009 it was. It is odd explaining to people why we chose that day and it isn’t really what I had wanted. However, it just felt right and we went with it. God knew that this date would be of significant value almost 4 years later. This is just confirmation that God absolutely has our whole lives planned and goes before us. Because 4 years later, we met our son from Ukraine who just so happened to be born on February 13^th. That date in an instance made so much sense.

When we were first married we volunteered a lot with both middle school and high school youth groups. We loved working with teenagers and really felt like we were called to work with kids. Alex was in church one Sunday when he heard so clearly God tell him that he needed to help kids. That was it. He didn’t know what to do with it or what he was suppose to do with that calling. For me, it was more slow coming. I had this small seed planted in my heart for children. I’d read blogs of people adopting. I’d see pictures of the faces of orphans and I’d think how amazing that was. I still had a piece of me that really believed adopting was so wonderful, but it was for people who couldn’t have children. I couldn’t deny this small flame in me though that kept feeling like I needed to help children. I didn’t know if it was raising money for terminally ill children, or helping kids in need…I just didn’t know. Alex and I just kept praying, and praying much more specifically for God to use us as He wants, that we will go wherever He leads. One day out of the blue, clear as day, I read a blog post about a teenaged boy from Latvia who desperately needed a family to call his own. Although this particular boy wasn’t to be ours, I just knew right then and there, there was no denying my calling. That tiny seed, that small flame, was now this huge passion in me. It was orphans that God had been preparing our hearts for. Alex came home and I told him all about how I felt, how strongly I felt about this and he said “Let’s go for it!”. It was like a light bulb turned on, for both of us. And this is where our story really begins.

It was the summer of 2012 and we had decided, after much prayer, that Ukraine is where we were being called to help a child. We decided to host a child for Christmas with the intention of adopting so we looked through photo listing after photo listing, pondering their little bios and narrowed down our choices. We finally picked the boy we wanted to host and began preparing for his arrival. Hosting isn’t cheap; we had to pay for airfare, visas, etc and didn’t know where the money would come from. We prayed to God that if this is what He wanted us to do, He would have to provide. And provide He did. We were rear ended in an accident in the summer of 2011. We were so frustrated we hadn’t gotten our settlement yet, but God knew exactly when we would need that money. And it came in right when we needed it for hosting this boy, 18 months later. God is so good. We got a dreaded email that December saying that this child actually couldn’t come anymore for hosting. I was devastated, more so for the child because I knew that this was his only hope of a family. I was ready to give up, I thought I must be wrong about what God wanted us to do. Alex said no…we need to pray. Pray we did. That’s when GOD picked the child HE wanted us to have. We were given pictures and a bio of a 15 year old boy named Sergey who would be able to come last minute. We said okay and cautiously started to get excited. December 20^th, 2012 our lives changed forever. Not only did I go that morning to the doctors and be told I was having a miscarriage, but that night, I met my son at the airport. I knew in an instant this was our boy. I fell hard. We drove home with our fussy 2 year old from San Francisco airport and all he did was try to make her happy and quiet her. He succeeded and they both drifted off into sleep.

Hosting changed our lives. It broke our hearts for what breaks His. Our world vision changed. Our hearts were made softer. We experienced unexplainable joy. We watched a 15 year old boy experience Christmas for the first time. We did so many firsts for him; baking cookies and having a flour-throwing fight, driving to see all the magical Christmas lights, laughing with family, being loved unconditionally, finding a family, opening gifts just for him, ice skating, singing Christmas music, church, being able to eat until he was actually full, having plenty of clothes and shoes, a warm bed every night and so much more. We would always hug and kiss him and tuck him into bed every night and I’d say I loved him in both English and Russian. It took him about 2 weeks to learn his first phrase and say “I love you” at bedtime. He was calling us mom and dad and telling us he loved us in no time. I’d tell him to come to my bed when he woke up in the morning, where my daughter and I watched cartoons in the morning. At first he would just stand by the bed, but over those weeks it morphed into him running and jumping in our bed for cartoons, tickling our daughter, talking about our dreams, how we slept, requesting what he would love for breakfast. It was the perfect way to start our mornings. He helped with everything without being asked. He brought in the groceries, he got our daughter in and out of her carseat, he pushed the stroller, he would drop everything to play with our daughter whenever she wanted. He would snuggle her to sleep and tell her “I love you sister”. They adored eachother. Sergey was family to us. It just felt right, It felt like he belonged. It felt like he had always been there. He was this 15 year old kid who had the most sweet heart, that was so loving, caring, kind, respectful and helpful. In the short month we had him, he knew what it meant to be a part of a family. He learned that God wasn’t so bad afterall and a mustard seed of faith was planted in him. We expressed our want to adopt him with an agency and we put in information to see if he was available for adoption. We found out he was not available. It was the most horrible feeling. Here you have this child who you just know with everything in you that he is yours and your told that he can’t be adopted, atleast not now. We were told they would work on it after the kids got back to Ukraine. We prayed, and cried, and prayed some more on our knees. Our time had to end, sadly. We drove to the San Francisco airport on January 13^th and stayed at a hotel as we had to be at the airport at 4am on the 14^th. We all swam at the hotel and then got all ready for bed in our room. We had two queen beds side by side and our daughter crawled out of our bed and into Sergey’s. She snuggled in as close as she could get and he wrapped his arm around her and they were out. I couldn’t sleep at all that night. All I did was stare at my kids sleeping and thinking about how this was it, I had to say bye in just a few hours. I couldn’t stand it after awhile, the alarm was going to go off in 45 minutes and I was just a mess. I crawled in their bed with them, and put my arms around my kids. Sergey woke up and he heard me balling into my pillow. He sat up and opened his arms and held me as I sobbed into his chest, in the pitch dark room. He looked at me and said “don’t cry mom”. I said “I can’t help it, I love you, you are my son, and I don’t want you to go. I can’t live without you”. That’s when he lost it and I held him as he sobbed into my chest this time. We laid there and cried in each others arms until the alarm went off. We all got ready as quickly as possible, made sure he had everything, me blowing my nose and crying through it all. We all got in the elevator, Sergey and I looked in the mirror on the way down and laughed at our huge swollen, red, eyes. We rode to the airport, and we waited. All the kids had to check in. And then it was time. It was time to say goodbye, or see you soon. It sure felt like bye without knowing the outcome of being able to adopt him. It was the most gut wrenching thing I’ve ever done. I was sending a piece of my heart on a plane to a place where my sweet boy didn’t belong. I couldn’t breath. It was the ugly cry. Alex cried and I can count on one hand the times he has cried in the 10 years I had known him. Sergey was the only child crying, he was sobbing. He looked miserable. He did not want to go. That was probably the hardest day of my life. The grief, was just overwhelming.

Our only way of communication after he returned to Ukraine was over the internet on a site similar to facebook. I told him to write me as soon as he got home. He wrote me that he loved us and wanted to live here, that he wanted us to adopt him. He’d write me as the days passed that he would wake up and realize he wasn’t here and cry. My heart just continued to break. The facilitator who met him at the airport upon returning said that he had made an incredible transformation, that he was a changed kid. She promised she would do everything in her power to get him available. We prayed. We cried. We had people praying all over the place. Churches, friends, family, prayer networks, people we didn’t know. We’d beg on our knees for God to bring our son back home. This was an emergency, with his age, we just didn’t have time. We were told even if everything went right, our chances of him being able to be registered and available for adoption was about 5% . We needed a miracle. A lawyer was sent to his region to do all the paperwork and we waited. And waited some more. All we could do was wait and pray. We got the email that we had all prayed for! Sergey was registered and would be available for adoption in April 2014! We had a whole year to wait, but oh how we praised God. God did the impossible. Glory be to Him.

With a whole year to wait, we decided to host him again just this summer. This time, hosting was for 2 months. Twice the time with our son! We had generous donations and worked our tails off for the rest, selling everything we could think of, having garage sales, and selling premade dinners. God provided yet again and we had the hosting fees in full. June 29^th, we all gathered yet again at the airport. I had the biggest butterflies, we were all beyond excited. Even our daughter could hardly wait. The moment I saw him, we locked eyes and he ran into my arms. I hugged him for what seemed like forever, him crying into my shoulder, me tears rolling down my cheeks. Oh, happy day! Everything took off right where it left off. We got home, and all sat on the ground to talk and rough house. All our daughter wanted to do was sit in Sergey’s lap with her arms around his neck and her little face nuzzled right into his neck. It is an understatement to say that she missed her brother. Sergey still lit up every day when Alex would get home from work. This now, 16 year old kid would still shout “Daddy!” whenever he got home from work. He had two kids running to him for hugs and love. We talked very seriously about him living here, what we would expect of him, what would and would not be allowed. This boy would agree to anything just to be able to have his family forever…he didn’t mind anything, he just wants to be here so bad. He again experienced so many firsts: water park, roller coasters, tons of swimming, river rafting, boating, swimming in the ocean, fireworks, water fights, camping…it was a wonderful summer. It all just felt so comfortable, so right. I asked him why he wants to be adopted and he said “mom, I want a chance at a better life, a new life. I have no chance in Ukraine. You’re my family”. August 14^th came all too soon. We hugged and cried, but this time we all had hope that the next time we saw him, we would be in Ukraine in April to bring him home for good. It still wasn’t easy. Looking at my poor boys eyes swollen and puffy, crying as he hugged our daughter goodbye, watching him walk away, is just never easy. Sending a child you love with all your heart to a land unknown to you, to a place where he goes hungry, doesn’t get to bathe much, without a family, without someone watching over him, without heat and adequate clothing, is just hard. I sobbed into Alex’s chest after I couldn’t see him anymore. I kept telling myself he is coming back, we are going to have him for good.

So, here we are, in November with just a few months left until we can go get our son and bring him home forever. A place where all his needs will always be met, where he will experience love daily, a place to call home, a life that he would never otherwise get to have. He now has a chance at life, he was chosen.

To give a clearer picture of what Sergey would face, here are some statistics: Only 10% of orphans in Ukraine will have any kind of normal, meaningful life. 70% of orphan girls will fall victim into sex slavery, and 70+% of boys will end up criminals and in prison. 1 in 6 commit suicide because life is so bad. Between the ages of 15-16, orphans are put out on the streets to figure out life themselves, unprepared. Many commit crimes just so they can be in prison and have a warm place to sleep at night and food to eat. Few live to see their 23^rd birthday. In an index of “Best Places to Be Born” published this year, with 80 countries being listed, 1 being the best and 80 being the worst, Ukraine falls at number 78 with only Kenya and Nigeria being worse. He has no chance at going to college or having a career and making a life for himself as in Ukraine your labeled as an orphan for the rest of your life. You never get to escape your past.

Adoption is very expensive, it is something we didn’t have saved for. The whopping number is about $35,000 for us. We’ve slowly came up with about $10,000, some of which we’ve already used completing our home study and tons of other paperwork and legal fees. We are still in need of $25,000 to rescue our boy in April. I know so many think “Well, why should we pay for your kid? If you want this child, you need to figure it out!”. It is so hard to explain that it is SO much more than that. We all can’t adopt, but we all can help save a child. While the statistics of the number of orphans is staggering, saving just one makes a difference. It matters to him. He is a life worth saving. If the body of Christ could come together to redeem this boys life, there would be one less orphan in the world in April. You are just as important to this child’s life as we are. You can help write his story too. Please help us bring Sergey home for good, where he belongs. Where he has hope and a future, love and family. Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world-James 1:27. With God, all things are possible-Matthew 19:26.

This and That

Just some tidbits I don't want to forget:

Sitting on the couch tonight, S and pumpkin are snuggling together and he pulls blanket over them and wraps his arms around her. They both close their eyes, her cheek on his cheek, he kisses her cheek and they fall asleep in eachothers arms.

Asking S what he wants to be when he grows up. I jokingly say a striper and he very seriously says yes. Oh goodness...what am I in for?

I talked to S seriously about living here. No sex, no alcohol, no smoking, going to school every day, obeying rules, etc. He says "no problem, I ask you mom". I know better than to believe that, but it just shows me that this kid is willing to agree to anything I say in order to just be here, forever. It melts my heart.

We had our first little "tiff". He has a gophone while here and the rules are mom and dad can look through his phone whenever we want, and he has to give phone back every night to us. He had been placing the phone on our bed every night voluntarily. Except last night. I went to get the phone, no problem. Plug it in in our room. He comes back in, and does something quickly on his phone. I quickly realize he signed out of an account. Hiding stuff! This morning he asked for phone and I said absolutely not, no phone today. I said our family is based on love, honesty, trust, respect, etc. I told him he now has parents who love him and care what he does. That we are will watch over him. That hiding things are not okay. By the end of conversation, he was fine...rest of the day has been great. I was pleased with how fast he got over it.

He keeps me going constantly. I tried to take a nap this afternoon with pumpkin, and he barges in first just to sit in our bed and wiggle his legs. Then he leaves and plays soccer inside. Then again, just as I was falling asleep, shakes me, "mom, mom, skateboard, outside? Keys machina, where?". I fall back asleep. Next thing I know "mom, mom, scarlett stink!" I say okay and close my eyes. He comes again, "get up! Mom, get up! Scarlett stink!". I get up...yes, scarlett pooped. S had sprayed Cologne in the entire house. I put the dog outside, doorbell rings. Neighborhood kid asks if we can go swimming. So off we went. No rest for the wicked.

We had two chaperones stay with us this week and I was so nervous he would gravitate towards them and forget we exist. He'd be able to speak to them, relate to them, etc. To my surprise, he didn't want much to do with them and only talked to them if they asked him questions. The chaperones said "s unequivocally wants to be adopted by you, he already considers you his parents, don't even worry about anything". Loved hearing that! It was fun trying Ukrainian food and showing them our area and crazy American life! I got big, long hugs goodbye, I think it was a success!

S is so excited for Cars & Coffee tomorrow with "daddy". Guy time!

I got tickled to death on the couch! He did not know how ticklish I was and held my legs in an underarm lock and tickled my feet to death. I told him to rub my feet and I'd give him his phone. I got tricked into being tortured. Then he said my hair stinks. I said I just washed it, but thanks. He said it smelled like pool. I said I always smell good...he said yes...true. Then said "me too". I said Umm...no, you don't always smell good hunny. He stared at me blankly like "huh?". Gotta love him!

4th of July was awesome! We had our dear friends come over and S really enjoyed hanging out with their family. The kids played basketball, S rode bikes, lit fireworks, water balloon fight...a night to remember. S was initially really scared of the fireworks and would grab my arm but by the end of the night he was helping Dad light them.

We went to my parents house last weekend and when it was time to go home he was NOT happy and pumpkin was crying. I had two unhappy kids. We had SO much fun. So many firsts for S. Water slides, tons of swimming, river rafting, boating/tubing...one of the best weekends ever!

We met up with another family that we met last hosting period and have grown to love so much. We took the kids to the beach, skate park, wharf, and beach again. S actually went swimming in the freezing cold water. I was shocked...he hates being cold. He was probably trying to impress the girl they are hosting ;). It was a great day!

Everything feels so comfortable, so right. It feels like he's always been in our life. He just fits. I love him something fierce.

He's Home For Summer!

We picked up S this last Saturday, June 29th. I am so happy to have my kids all home, under one roof.

S practically ran into my arms with a huge smile, and hugged me so tight. I looked at his face and he had tears coming out of his eyes. On a 16 year old boy. He was so happy to be back with his family. He had been waiting to be with the people who love him dearly.

At home, we all sat down on the ground to rough house and my daughter just wanted to be in his lap, arms wrapped around his neck, and her little face muzzled into the side of his neck while chanting over and over again his name. It made my heart so happy that she very obviously remembered him so well, but yet how much she has missed him. They've been pretty inseparable. He is so amazing with her...I could watch them wrestle and laugh for hours. Have I mentioned how much I love his long goodnight and goodmorning hugs and "I love yous"? Just the best! And the way he still lights up when my husband comes home from work and jumps up to hug him.

Today, S was playing with my daughter in the play room(entertaining her) and next thing I know, they are laying side by side, she's twiddling his eyelashes, leg wrapped around his waist, his arm around her, both crashed out. Gosh, I love them.

S brought a cold with him and he is pretty miserable right now. I am praying he gets better quickly and that we all stay well.

S is taller. He has leg hair. A 6 pack, ripped body. Broader shoulders. A deeper voice. And his face looks older. He's changed so much in 5.5 months and I feel like I am missing out on so much. He's so handsome, he's really becoming a teenager. I need this boy to be home for good, to teach him and mold him into a Jesus-loving, good man who makes good choices. A good husband. And father. April can't come soon enough.

We get almost 7 weeks with our boy, verses the 3 we had over winter and I couldn't be happier...a happy momma heart. I just love knowing he's home, that I can mother him from home, and not from a helpless place, across a pond.

I will love and cherish every minute of every day with this kid for the next several weeks. Even the rough times, because atleast he's HOME.

Blessed

So much has happened these last couple weeks. It gives me chills to think of how good our God is, what an amazing God I serve. Just when I need to be lifted up when I am starting to sink, God shows up and picks me up. Love that! Here's some tidbits from the last couple weeks that I am so grateful for:

S will be here June 29th to August 14th! Almost 7 weeks with my babe! Woohoo!

We were short $1700 to host S. Two families, who did not know eachother came forward so we would not be without our son this summer. One gave us $1,000, the other $700. Exactly what we needed, on the same day. God is good.

I was contacted from someone who owes me money from 3 years ago, telling me they are sending me what they owe me the first week of June.wow!

My husband and I were debating between visiting a family friend last weekend or on June 8th. We prayed about it because our money was stretched thin for this last week before pay day. We decided to go and gosh, it was a God given weekend!! We went to church on Sunday, where our friend attends. We were so warmly welcomed. After the service, our friend said "Hurry, I think the couples group today is on orphan ministry!" We rushed over, and indeed, they were going to be talking about orphan care. We watched an awesome video(need to figure out the name!) that made me cry pretty hard. I realized I had just met the president of Christian Alliance For Orphans. Pretty cool...that is a HUGE organization that almost all of us adoptive mommas know of. We then broke up into small groups and cried some more. We learned one of the couples that was there had recently had God place a calling to adopt from Ukraine on their hearts. It was just all so meant to be. We met some pretty great people, started new relationships, have more people praying, and more support in our journey.

We were filling out grant applications for our adoption and realized a lot of them asked how your church has supported your adoption. So I took the leap and emailed our pastor. We got a positive reply and are praying this is just the very beginning for our church and orphan ministry. Please keep this in your prayers!

We are doing another dinner fundraiser where we deliver meals this Friday and we have even more sales than the last time!

I have literally seen God moving in my parents lately which has been something we've prayed for. I see their hearts opening to adoption and orphan care and it just touches my heart and brings me to tears.

I have cried so much this last week, mainly from being blown away by my God. Sometimes I think things are impossible, that God couldn't possibly do this or that. But just as soon as I start to feel that way, He knows, and He picks me up off the floor and tells me "Danielle, I have laid this journey on your heart, I've told you to do this, and I am not going to have you start and not see you through to the end. No. I will see you until the very end of this, when you've brought my child home." Fundraising, coming up with so much money, just is overwhelming at times. Sometimes I feel alone, defeated, beat down. These couple weeks have given me the push I need to go full speed ahead again. To keep putting one foot infront of the other, as God has called us to do. No one ever said adoption would be easy. No one ever said following Jesus would be easy. Quite the contrary. It is in stepping out in our faith that we've found our deepest relationship with Him that we've ever had. We are often left gripping onto strings. Strings that God gives us to hold on and keep pressing on to serve Him. I wouldn't have it any other way, because caring for the fatherless has blessed us in ways we just can't put into words. Love, love, love the God we serve and just feeling so thankful for these huge blessings lately.

*Most recent picture of my boy that we were sent from Ukraine!

~Danielle

We finally have news!

Well...it seems like we have waited months and months for the official news, when in reality it was about 3. S did NOT get the waiver for the 12 month waiting time. At first, I just cried. That's a momma's first reaction though. My mind instantly went to "my poor baby has to sit in that place for another year". I had prayed and prayed, on my knees, for God to prepare my heart and accept His answer. I knew God is good, all of the time, and although I may not understand His answers at first, eventually I would. I quickly went from crying to a heart filled with gratitude. I was thankful that the SDA got and processed S's paperwork quickly. I was thankful that we actually had a date he would be available for international adoption that we could look forward to, count down to, and get prepared for(It is the beginning of April). I was thankful that even though waiting a year means paying $5,400 more in hosting, it gives us more time to gather the $19,000 we still need for his adoption. I was thankful that it wasn't 12 months we had to wait anymore, but 11. I knew the situation could be so much worse, and I was just thankful that although not ideal, we could go get him before we know it!

So where does that leave us right now? Well...fundraising. God called us on this journey, and no doubt, He will provide. I cry every time someone I least expect to, helps us, or donates, or offers prayers. It just means so much to me. To us. S will come here for summer, for double the time of winter hosting. He keeps telling me how much he misses his sister...how he loves us and wants to make sure he's coming back. I love that boy. My arms are aching to hold him, my ears are burning to hear him talk and say I love you again. I can hardly wait for him to see how much his sister has grown. I can hardly wait to have my boy home for almost 2 months. 1.5 more months to go until that piece of my heart gets off that plane and back where he belongs!

We are hoping to do so many things with S this summer. It is always crazy trying to cram so much into just a few, much to short, weeks. 

The countdown begins! <3

Getting Closer

Well, it is April! April is THE month that will tell us what the next year will or won't look like. We either hear S was granted a waiver, come get him and we prepare tons of paperwork and go to get him this summer, or it means we have to wait until next Spring/Summer and somehow come up with hosting expenses twice more. We've been told we should know around the end of the month. We are just waiting upon on the Lord. Some days I let the anxiety get to me of waiting an entire year for my boy, and coming up with even more money that we need to raise. But most days, I am just surrendering to God and letting him take these huge battles that I can't possibly fight. I give God all of my worries and ask Him to sort them out, to work the details out, and to let it all work out for the good of S and us all. God is good, all the time. He's got this!

Join us in prayer as this time is now here for our lawyer/facilitator to work their bums off to get a waiver. To let them speak to just the right people, let God prepare the hearts of the people they will speak with, let the lawyer/facilitator say exactly the right things, and just let a miracle work here. Pray, pray, pray! We appreciate any and all prayers!

13

Nothing new to report on the adoption front. We did get all our paperwork finished for homestudy though! Woohoo! Now we wait for approval, then we apply for grants. We need a lot more finances for this adoption!

So, the number 13. My mom was declared cancer free on the 13th day of the month. I was married on Friday the 13th, 4 years ago. And S's birthday is on the 13th day of the month. Coincidence, I think not! Our anniversary and S's birthday share the same date. Both month and day. When we got married 4 years ago, we went to the courthouse in San Francisco. I wanted to get married on Valentine's Day so bad. Obviously, the courts aren't open on the weekends, so we had no choice but Friday the 13th. It wasn't ideal, but I decided the 13th would be our "lucky" day.

Little did I know that God had already had everything planned out. It amazes me. It gives me goosebumps. That He works in the tiny details years and years in advance. That He has your whole life mapped out before you are even conceived. 4 years ago, I would have thought you were funny if you told me we were going to adopt, and a teenager at that! God has a way of opening our eyes, slowly changing us, breaking us for what breaks Him. The 13th wasn't the day I wanted, but it was the day God wanted. Because 4 years later it would have SO much more meaning, and we would share this joyous date with our son. Little did we know, our son was born on the day we were married, years before.

You see, God works in the details. Today, I am SO happy that is the year God has us get married so that we could NOT be married on the 14th, but the 13th, so we could share this day with our boy. It just validates so much. It is not coincidence. That's God.

I have great faith in knowing He is working out every last detail right this moment.

BIG Prayers!

OK, we think we may have found a way to make S available for international adoption, thus waiving the one year waiting period. Ukraine says if children have a "special disease", all wait times can be waived. I was able to come across a PDF file that listed acceptable diseases and many, many heart defects are listed. S has a heart defect! This could be our miracle! Can you fathom, our God, giving this sweet boy a heart condition when He created S, just so 16 years later he could be adopted? That would be God's plan. It brings me to my knees just trying to imagine how much God knows, how he brings everything together, unfolds all the little details, and works on things in your life years in advance when you have no idea the plans the Lord has for you. Amazing doesn't begin to.touch it.

Our facilitator is going to be looking into this and seeing if it is something that will work for S. We need really urgent, strong prayer that THIS is our answer. That we can go and rescue this child. Please pray S will fit into this medical clause and his waiting time will be waived. I believe in the power of prayer. I believe in God to make all things possible. Please spread the word and get this prayer chain BIG! Yeah!

With God, all things are possible. ~Matthew 19:28

Due for an update

I don't have a lot to update with, but I do have some stuff I can let you all in on!

We had been praying to find someone who speaks Russian to call S with us so we could translate. Finally found the sweetest family to do so! So thankful! We've tried calling a couple times and haven't talked to him yet. On the bright side, we've talked to his aunt who signed over her rights and she was very nice. Thanked us a few times for all we've done for S and how much she appreciates that he has someone who cares about him. It kills me that it took 16 years to find someone. But he has been found now, that's all I can focus on! On the down side, we learned his situation is much worse than we ever could have thought. Without saying too much on here, S doesn't really have any authority figure and isn't held accountable to do anything or be anywhere. He will leave for days at a time, doesn't go to school every day, and may be selling his belongs for money just to get by. I took this news pretty hard. Who is watching over my tender hearted boy? Is he being influenced in a negative way? Where does he go when he leaves? Where is he tonight? Is he hungry? Is he warm? There's no one to love on him, to show him right from wrong, to encourage him. While these thoughts and many more creep into my mind, they make me absolutely crazy. I HAVE to trust in God and rely on my faith. That God will sustain him. I know this way of life for him is nothing new. I know this is his "normal". It is gut wrenching for a mother though. To mother from across the pond.

S had a birthday and we had a cake delivered. That sucker cost $70, but I can't be there with him to make his birthday special. So, I am pretty sure I can't put a price tag on trying to make him feel special, wanted, and remembered on "his day". He wrote me how thankful he was that we remembered him with the cake. Oh hunny, we will never ever forget you. You will never be forgotten ever again, my love.

Please continue to pray hard for a waiver on his waiting time. Again, we won't know until April but we almost HAVE to have this happen for adoption to be possible. We were told getting S on the registry would be nearly impossible. God did it. We are told getting a waiver on the 1 year wait is almost impossible. But we know God is bigger than that. We know anything is possible through Him. We will continue to pray for a miracle because S deserves no less. He is SO close to becoming your typical aged-out orphan teenage in Ukraine. That just can't happen to him. So please join is in prayer!

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who[a] have been called according to his purpose. ~Romans 8:28

Longing

I miss him. I received an email yesterday of a picture of S from the lawyer that went to his region. S had the biggest smile, so much pure joy. I've seen more than a few photos of him from his orphanage and he was never smiling. I can't help but think in that moment he knew...he knew we wanted him. He knew he was meeting with the lawyer to get him on the registry because we CHOSE him.

I was so thankful to get that picture. At the same time, it was so hard. I cried. A lot. I miss him. More than words can express. My arms ache to hug him. I miss seeing his smile. The way his skin crinkles up around his eyes when he smiled, the hint of dimples, the huge-open- mouth-beautiful smiles. The sound of his laughter. His giggles. Oh, he's a giggler. I miss how I'd have to watch my every move or sure enough the kid would jump out and scare me! He succeeded in that numerous times a day; I guess I never learned. I miss feeling his arms around me, holding onto to me when I hugged him. Squeezing me tightly, lingering the hug with his head resting on my shoulder. I miss my kisses on the cheek goodnight. I miss the sound of him saying "I love YOU". I miss the sound of his voice saying "mom!" From down the hall. I miss his "goodmornings" and "goodnights". I miss having him help me with Pumpkin, buckling her in the carseat, carrying her, playing with her, getting her snacks or breakfast. Not because I need the help but because I see his love for her and it just melted my heart. It was so heartwarming to see how eager he was to make her happy. To be her big brother. He loved her so naturally. Like we had always been together. I miss seeing the two of them together. So far apart in age, but so connected at the heart. I miss his silliness, how he finds random things funny; just like me. I just miss the sound of his voice! My heart aches for him. I miss telling him "Good job!". The way he looked up to me to make sure I was watching him. The way his face look when I approved, when I told him how good he was at something. Because I don't think anyone has. I miss watching him play soccer and basketball and cheering him on. I miss playing card games with him, how competitive he is. How excited he gets when he wins. I miss hearing him sing to songs on the radio, seeing him dance. I actually miss how frustrated we would both get trying to understand eachother, most always ending up in hysterical laughter. I can feel the absence of him in our family. We are missing someone. I am longing for him. God, please bring me back this boy as quickly as possible.

I see other families that get to Skype, and talk on the phone every day to their child. I silently envy them. I know it's wrong to feel that way and I know I shouldn't. But I can't help but to want the same. I can't help, as a mother, wanting to hear my sons voice every day. Wanting to see his beautiful face. I just keep telling myself that I will see his face and hear his voice everyday for years to come. This little voice just keeps telling me to keep going. One foot infront of the other. One day at a time.

Then I beg with God. I beg for Him to please create a miracle and let this year+ wait be waived for our boy so he can be back where he belongs. Because this momma misses her son.

Yay!

This is a few days late...but we found out amazing news last week! I couldn't sleep one night, it was around 2am and I just had a strong urge to check my emails. Much to my surprise, I had an email waiting from our facilitator. My heart started racing as I opened it and I was just shocked. I had no words besides a huge grin on my face and "thank you God" running through my mind. She had written how the lawyer got S on the registry and how she was able to do something that usually takes months in 1.5 weeks. She told me S wanted her to tell me he loves us and misses us. She said she probably won't know until April whether or not the 12 month waiting period can be waived or not. I woke up my husband right away and told him. We both rejoiced and thanked God for this huge miracle. For turning the nearly impossible into possible. God is SO good.

I don't know if I've touched on this before, but in Ukraine there is a year waiting period once a child gets placed on the registry. Ukrainians get one year to adopt the child, then if after a year they are still available, the child is eligible for international adoption. It is really, really rare, but sometimes this waiting period can be waived. We are praying really hard on this that the waiting period is waived and we can get S just as quickly as possible.

We've learned recently that when people and children find out a child is being adopted, the child faces great pressure and criticism. S has told us of this in the last week and it has concerned us. We know God is with him doing what we can't but this momma can't still help but to worry.

Please join us in prayer that 1) The 12 month waiting period is waived. For God to go before the lawyer and prepare the hearts of whoever our lawyer will be speaking with to want to do good for this child. To let us travel to get him as soon as humanly possible. 2) To keep S strong under all the pressure and negativity against adoption. Let him hold us and our amazing memories fresh and close to his heart.

We appreciate all your prayers...the power of prayer has just been amazing and has moved mountains! We must keep it up!

Praise and Prayet Request of New Week

Let's praise our all amazing God first! We received news that S should be able to be placed on the registry by the end of THIS week! Our lawyer and facilitator have been hard at work making this happen. Jesus has been at work creating miracles and we are ever so thankful. Thankful isn't a big enough word to describe our gratitude. I just know He is moving mountains and letting the impossible be possible.

Next up: prayer request! This week besides asking our Lord to finalize all paperwork for registry, we need prayer so urgently that the year long waiting period for us to adopt will be somehow, someway...waived. In Ukraine, once a child is registered, they give a year for their own citizens to adopt that child. If in a year the child has not been adopted, then the child is made available for international adoption. We just don't have that kind of time with S's age. And even if we did, my baby doesn't deserve to be where he is for a day longer than he has to. So just for God to go before this lawyer and prepare the hearts of the people she will be speaking with. Let them WANT to help in every way possible and find a way to waive this waiting period so we can get our boy just as quickly as possible. Pray God speaks directly through our lawyer and facilitator to make this all happen.

This is so hard for us, but we are standing firm in our faith that God will intervene, He will create this miracle to save this child. I hear from S regularly, and he is just aching to be in our arms. We are too, baby. When I tell you he is the sweetest boy I've ever met, I mean it. I still cry for him...I just long to wrap my arms around him and take him "home" for good. To a place where he will have unconditional love, a family, a Jesus centered life, where we can work through his past, get him an education, and did I mention just love? Love can do powerful things. I love this boy something fierce, Jesus loves this boy more than I which I can't comprehend.  “I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you." John 14:18.

I thank you from the bottom of my heart for any and all prayers, as does my family.

<3 Danielle

Specific Prayer Request

We have a specific prayer request for S's Aunt to terminate her rights as a guardian to him as soon as Monday. A lawyer will be going to his region on Monday to start this process. Although so many things still have to go right, this is our immediate need heading into a new week. My family thanks you in advance for any prayers for our situation!

  I can do all things through him who strengthens me. ~ Philippians 4:13 

We have a PRAISE Report!!

Our facilitator wrote us last night and said she thinks she has found a way for this all to work out and to keep praying! God is hearing all of our prayers, our desperate cries for help and miracles.

This gives us strength and hope to keep going day by day, living another day without S. God is good, He is so powerful, so amazing. I can't praise him enough!

I will leave you with a photo of my kids that is hanging on the wall. Don't stop praying for this situation!

And So It Begins...

It all started with God calling my husband and I to help children. We had no idea how or what we were suppose to do so we just prayed together about it. One day in late summer 2012 I read about a hosting organization, New Horizons For Children, on a blog and I knew instantly. I called my husband to tell him about it and he said "Let's do it". This was our calling and God had finally given us direction.

New Horizons For Children is a hosting program. They go to Latvia and Ukraine to interview children at orphanages then when they return, photos and some information about each child is posted on an online album. Then you select your child and host them for about a month. Though this isn't an adoption agency, many of these children end up adopted and saved by loving families in the US.

Our story is long, and was completely God's devine planning. We selected a 16 year old boy from Latvia and began preparing our hearts this last summer. Two weeks before he was scheduled to arrive, we were told he could no longer come because he had bad behavior. We were so heartbroken. More for him, because we knew the horrible life he had ahead of him and knew this was his last chance for a family(more on the life of these kids later!). I wanted to give up, I said "enough, I am done!". My husband encouraged me to pray and really thought this was just a road bump and we needed to get back up and move forward. We prayed together for a couple days when I received an email asking If I had heard about this other hosting organization. Project 143. New Horizons was closed to selecting children as the dates were so close to the kids coming so we could no longer host with them. I called Project 143 and while they still had some available kids, getting flights into California was a problem. So she then referred me to Children's Cultural Connections...a hosting organization here in California. She not only had a available kids still, but could get plane tickets and everything done! My husband and I prayed deciding between a couple of kids, but it was pretty obvious to us we were to choose "S"(that's what we will refer to as his name). We made the phone call and anxiously awaited our boy arriving. Ginger at Children's Cultural Connection led us to the most sweet boy I've ever met in my life. I thank her from the bottom of my heart!

December 20th, it is a day I will never forget. That morning, I had went to the drs and got confirmation I was having a miscarriage and that night we met S at the airport. The moment I saw him, I knew he was mine. That was my son. I had missed out on 15 years of his life, he lives countries away, but oh my...I loved him big as the sky. We brought him home, I fed him, then tucked him in bed. Told him I loved him, was so happy he was here and to come to my room when he woke up.

That morning he came to my room as soon as he woke up and I told him to come sit with us(daughter and I) for morning cartoons. He just fit with us, like he had always been there. To keep this shorter, I will fast forward a bit and share more stories later on. By the time our month with him had passed, this boy was very clearly meant to be. God had led us to the most perfect boy for us. The most perfect family for him. God unfolded a plan that included losing one orphan to get to this boy. Let me tell you, there's no words to accurately express how amazing S is. Just after a week into hosting, he was calling us mom and dad, saying I love you, comfortable, wrestling with my daughter, laughing, having fun, being a kid. I dreaded the day he had to go home because I knew this boy was my son and I could not in no way, live my life without him.

Fast forward to yesterday morning, we had to do the unthinkable. Send our son back to Ukraine. We stayed at a hotel by the airport the night before because we had to be up by 4. We had 2 double beds, and pumpkin(our 2 year old daughter) climbed in his bed after we got done swimming. I told S she can sleep with us and he said no, it's ok. So I let her sleep in his bed. He shushed her to sleep, her twiddling his eyelashes(how she falls asleep if she's comfortable with you). I woke up every 15-20 minutes for the 4 hours we had to sleep and would look over at them. S held her the entire time, arms wrapped around her. I kept praying, God give me the strength, let us be able to do this when everything in me just wanted to run away with him. 1 Chronicles 16:11  Seek the LORD and his strength; seek his presence continually! At 4 he got up to go pee...he couldn't sleep much either so I got into their bed with my phone. I translated "I can't live without you" to S, then I started balling. He wrapped his arm around me. I got up to blow my nose and he had translated "please don't cry" which made me cry more then I grabbed him and held him in my arms and he cried and cried on my shoulder. He said "it's ok mom, and I said no it isn't." It's not ok he's going back somewhere where he has no mom and dad, where he is freezing every day, not fed enough, and not cared for. It's not. He said he loved me a few times. I told him I would not stop crying until he was in my arms again, that he is my son and I can't live without him. At the airport, when saying bye, he cried a lot, my husband cried a lot(don't think he has cried since our daughter was born). S was the only kid crying and everyone just kept saying how much this boy loves us, couldn't believe how strong our bond was. People looking at us were crying because they could see the heartbreak of us all. I just said yes, I love him...he's my son. 

He has made it back to Ukraine safely, thank God. Now here comes what we NEED YOU for. We obviously, want to adopt S. In Ukraine there is an adoption registry where directors of orphanages are suppose to list the children. Once listed, Ukraine gives 15 months for someone in their country to adopt. If after 15 months, they are still available, they then become available for international adoption. Sadly, we learned S has never been registered.
Oh, the devastation. Romans 12:12  Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer. I knew the devil would want us to feel defeated, would want us to give up on this boy, would want us to throw in the towel. We knew God would want us to persevere, to fight for this boy who so desperatly needs and deserves a family. James 1:2-4 Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. So here we are, fighting.

S turns 16 soon. Once they turn 16, they can no longer be adopted unless you've filed your immigration paperwork prior to their 16th birthday. Very delicate procedure. We have a facilitator in Ukraine trying to do everything possible to get this boy listed on the registry. We were told he had about a 5% chance. And that's only if everyone is in agreement to register him. Our facilitator will be going to his region hopefully next week to meet with his director at orphanage, guardian, and to go to various courts to see what can be done. There is a chance, a small chance. We've filed our immigration to cover our side...now we need God to work miracles in Ukraine.

PLEASE PRAY specifically for us to be the 5%. For God to bring S back permanently. For God to go before our facilitator and soften the hearts of those that all have to say "yes". To prepare them. And lastly, to 6. To let this all happen so fast that it makes no sense to humans. We do not have time, 1 month. God can perform miracle, This CAN happen. Please spread the word for us, this is so urgent. S also has a heart problem that we have no idea of the complexity of it which means he needs us even more. This boy is aging out of the system, this is his very last chance at any kind of life. His life has been horrible, can you pray this ONE thing goes right for him? My son is in Ukraine, in a place he doesn't belong. Pray, please pray.

Here is what an "aging out child" faces: only 10% of orphans in Ukraine will have any kind of normal, meaningful life. Most girls will fall victim into sex slavery, most boys will end up criminals and in prison. Many commit suicide because life is so bad. Between the ages of 16-18, they are put out of the orphanage to figure things out. Many will purposely commit crimes to go to prison to have a warm place to sleep and food to eat. It is a horrible, horrible situation. S is facing this harsh reality very, very soon.

If you've gotten this far, I again just ask for prayer that S is the 5%, that he WILL be added to the registry and can come back, permanently. I love this boy, no different than my daughter. I love him unconditionally, fiercely. I will do ANYTHING to get him back.

Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope